Gorillas in the Gravy
ORPirates of the Schukyll

 I remember a daily plague  visited upon us on South 10th street in the 60’s and 70’s, a sordid memory of a daily  invasion  at approximately 3 pm- for it was the danger time. For danger was unleashed upon the hapless residents of south 10th street in South Philadelphia ,a pox upon the good neighbors … For it was the hour of the Goretti Gorillas. Yes the time when the all Girls high school of St. Maria Goretti (Virgin and Martyr) at 10th and Moore opened its cloistered gates and spewed it hoard of South Philadelphia teenage ninjas princesses into the streets. No one who saw this massed invasion could ever forget them in their blue uniforms with color coded patches (representing their year group). Some with red sashes across their breasts signifying them as officers in some elite guard ( they were in reality some kind of student officer) . And their weapons- the sarcasm, the make up, the popping gum,and the dreaded key. Yes the locker key \ hung from a long ribbon attached to their uniform which these young Amazons swung with speed and agility – surely able to knock a man into South Jersey.

St. Maria Goretti, whose ancient Alma Mater rings out in musical memory  “We face the world our flag unfurled “ ..or was it skirts unfurled….? How , you may ask, do I know this song, my sister and a trolley car lode of cousins  were force to learn it, and I forced to listen to them learn i,t again and again and again. Not to mention the 35 odd St. Maria Goretti Graduations at the Civic Center I was required to attend.

St. Maria Goretti that fortress of femininity , sheltered from we boys that attended the all boy John Neumann High School ( St. John after 1978).

When the sexes are segregated at this tender age. It causes a strange chemical reaction that effected the Neumann boys, making them  triply immature in the presence of these young nymphs, allowing our adolescence to bloom in all its stupidity.  There were the occasional ‘raids’ during senior week when ( after pre-arranged plans with a secret group of 5th column girls) a gang of Neumann boys would rush into the holy sanctuary,  perhaps gaining a prearranged piece of undergarment and always  chased by the good sisters ( some of whom could have stopped Lee at Fredericksburg) and father Welsch (wasn't that the name of the Principal in the 70’s?). This followed by a stern telephone call to father Pollinio, the principal at Neumann,  to which assuredly he replied "you sure it was our boys I don’t think so."

To add to this the boys from Newman were dismissed earlier. They then cut across the swatch  of row homes and incestuousness streets  to stand outside the classroom of their beloved and call out their girl’s name as well as recite an ode to their love, totally disrupting the last period class and often resulting in Sister Helen Morgan poking her head out the window and threaten to come down and get medieval…

Bishop  Neumann High School,  originally called Southeast Catholic High School  and located at 8th and Christian ( siteis now luxury condos),  It changed names to Bishop Neumann and moved to 26th and Moore in 1956. Goretti was always there.. well since the early 60’s.

Neumann was certainly an institution, to be sure. While we did not, like the Goretti Gorillas , have uniformswe did look smart with our shirt, tie, and jackets. It was not however the Oxford -Brooks Brothers look , but the pink shirt and clip on bow tie  and an oval labelled corduroy Jacket , purchased  from Arnold’s on Passyunk Avenuethe, the  Savile Row of old South Philly.... who knew polyester could be so sweet.  Bow ties were very popular in the 70’s , not as a fashion statement , but because you could clip it on to one collar cuff and open the top shirt button , affording a sense of freedom ,as you did even remotely sense your were wearing a tie, but the good Norbertine fathers that ran the school caught on to this and forced us to button up in the late 70’s.

We Newman boys had our traditions , good Football & Basketball teams called the Neumann Pirates and a fantastic theater program with the legendary Frank Perry. Frank Perry was the Florenz Ziegfield of old South Philly. He recently retired after teaching  at Neumann for like 47 years or something. Can you image 47 years at Neumann. He produced more shows then Ziegfield.

Also note,  we always got it wrong in South Philly -it is pronounced Neu-man not New-man. We said Goretti correctly however (of course she was an Italian saint).

Goretti had a fine program but since my Goretti memories are mostly of the forbidden Amazons and the cloistered walls  I have little first hand experience of it. It had a great orchestra and Girl’s basketball team as well as  much more effective and organized Student associations and student government. Neumann’s student government reflected the politics of South Philly with each year group sprouting its own Tayoun and Cianfrani .. but never a Rizzo.. the good father’s would never allow that- they were the Rizzos.

I lived at 10th and Dickinson ,a few blocks from Goretti,  but being of the incompatible sex I was sent all the way to 26th and Moore Street to attend Neumann. This meant each morning I would have breakfast walk a half block to my friend Robert Giangirodano’s house, where his mom Grace (Graziele) gave me Breakfast II, then wait for Stanley Ianeri from 12th and Camac to join us, have Breakfast III while he had breakfast II, and then walk the half block to the Twin Shoppe at 10th and Tasker to board the Number 40 SEPTA  bus along Tasker to 26th street,  and then walk a few blocks to school. The SEPTA bus ride was it’s own story. The bus route took it thought what could be described as a neighborhood not exactly in harmony or receptive to the predominately Italian clientele on the bus. Not that I suggest any ethnic tension, heaven forbid- never in old South Philly- but there was the occasional accidental tossing of a bottle or rock or off hand remark tossed at ,or from, the bus. But for Neumann boys danger was our business…

We were told in 1971 that the Archdiocese, in its wisdom , was going to make both schools coed and save me the entire trek as I lived a 15 minute walk to Goretti. So we  waited and a few years later ( 35 if your counting) they decided to close Neumann all together and join both schools and stick them in the Goretti site. Yes finally cooed education after only 35 years, just in time for the 21st century. But by then we lost our fear of women and were married, divorced, married again,  and some even begin to look favorably on segregated education when their kids became teens.

Now they have closed the old halls of Neumann and the boys have  finally got into Goretti. I guess it is like St John the good Bishop married St. Maria ? I am not sure if that is theology sound. Have they added a statute of Bishop Neumann next to that of St. Maria Goretti with her combat boots??

If this was the UK they would call it St. John in St. Maria’s High School or St Mary on St John's School .....

To be sure  the new school will now make it’s own history and create a series of new and different memories.

Have the Pirates of the Schukyll and the Gorillas in the Gravy joined forces? Poor South 10 street .